Reverse Sexism. Don't Be A Man Hater!

My high school aged son came home today telling me of a tendency of one of his female teachers to make statements that are derogatory to males. Some of these statements consisted of "Oh, that is just like a man, "and "Well, of course you wouldn't understand that you are just a guy" etc. etc. She would say these things out of frustration when he and his other male classmates would make a mistake or not understand a concept she was trying to get across.

I don't know if you have noticed, but in the media men are portrayed very negatively. There are many programs on television that show them as weak, ignorant or morally inept. Movies are even worse. They put out a message that it is not OK to be male or behave in a masculine manner. I am frankly really tired of it. I would imagine many men are very tired of this as well. Especially men who are trying very hard to be good husbands and fathers. I have sons and this isn't helping them. It is demoralising and emasculating. It is wrong.

I can remember growing up in the 70s and 80s, when I was a young girl, men calling women all sorts of names. "Dumb broad" was one of those names, among others. It wasn't even aimed at me at the time. It was a generalization. It devalued me as female and it was very damaging to me as well. It made me look at my femininity as if something was wrong with being female! You can change your clothes, shoes and makeup but you cannot change your God given gender. I think the pendulum has moved to the other extreme at this point and you can see the vengeance in the attitudes of the media and woman-kind as a whole. As a society we view males in a very negative light. Masculinity is something to be scorned. This a dangerous move for our society. It causes havoc in marriages, in the family and in the lives of young men struggling to find out who they are and if who they are is OK. It causes a great deal of confusion in an already struggling young generation.

Men are wonderful. There is nothing wrong with being male or having male attributes. I admire their strength, courage and fire. I love that men love women! This is the way God made them. Those are all good qualities. I don't want men to stop being manly. As a society we lose when we force someone to be ashamed of their God given gender.

As a people whenever we stereotype or make blanket statements about the other gender it is very wrong. Yes, even if you are a woman! We don't get a free pass to act disrespectful because we were mistreated in the past and maybe even now. It won't make it better. If further widens the gender gap. God intended men and women be one in marriage. How can you be one with someone whose gender you despise? That can not happen.

My husband gave my son some very good advice regarding the incidents with his teacher. He told him to not get offended and offered up an explanation as to why she might behave that way. He said maybe she is having problems in her marriage or with a son. Perhaps she was mistreated by another male, maybe a male authority figure (which is probably pretty likely). He said "whatever the case may be do not get offended with her but ask her if he had offended her in any way." Maybe then she would think more carefully about her words and that they have the ability to damage these young men she is teaching. I wondered to myself if it had been a man making derogatory statements about women to my daughter would I have been so full of grace and forgiveness as my husband was? If it was a male teacher he would probably be reprimanded, maybe even fired. Since it is acceptable in our culture to "male bash" nothing will probably be done about this matter. However, I was really impressed how my husband handled the situation encouraging my son to give the woman grace.

There is a way human beings are supposed to relate. Specifically, there is a way men and women are supposed to treat each other.

Titus 2

1But as for you, teach what accords with sound doctrine. 2Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness. 3Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior,not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, 4and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled. 6Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled. 7Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, 8 and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.

Our mouths are powerful things. With them we can give life or we can bring death. I think the old sayings are the best. Previous generations had some simple truths that contained the most profound wisdom. If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. We need to stop tearing down people, specifically men. Maybe if we spent more time building people up and using our words to encourage others this world would be a much different place. As women we truly need to not return evil for evil. It won't accomplish what we are hoping for. I don't know anyone who is motivated to be better with harsh put downs and criticism, do you?

Proverbs 18:21:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.


Lets get past what is "acceptable" in our culture and do the right thing. Male bashing is just as bad as female bashing. It is all hate. As Christians this is not an acceptable standard. As a mother it is heartbreaking.

God bless and Good Night.